On behalf of Canadians everywhere, I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.
I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron, but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all, it's not like you actually elected him.
I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more forests than you, doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own.
I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defence, I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours.
I'm sorry we burnt down your white house during the war of 1812. I notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice.
I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer but, we feel your pain.
I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you wanna have your friends by your side right at the outset. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.
And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this. We've seen what you do to countries you get upset with.
Hey, keep it up, and I'll have to upload some Arrogant Worms!
Oh, wait, they're Canadian. Ever hear their song, "The War of 1812?"
"And the White House
Burned, burned, burned,
And we're the ones that did it."
Hehehe.
Posted by: Scott on March 4, 2003 05:09 AMHold on...you lost me on the beer wisecrack. Sure, we have mainstream abominations such as Bud and Miller (is Moosehead or Labatts really any better?), but here on the West Coast we have dozens of excellent microbrews.
And he's not a Crazed Dictator. He's an Evil Doer. Get it right.
Posted by: Beerzie Boy on March 4, 2003 08:14 AMYeah - I have two of their CD's "Russel's Shorts" and "C'est Cheese". As for beer - yes even our standard brew like Labatts or Molson's are much better than your standard fare like Millers, Budweiser etc. As for micro breweries :-) where do you think the movement started :-)
(well actually it started in Englandas a revolt against the monolithic breweries there and the rapid demise of the independent pub brewery, then the movement was imported to Canada - specifically Vancouver and the rest is, as they say, history).
Posted by: The Dynamic Driveler on March 4, 2003 09:10 AMAs an American, I would like to accept your apology. Unfortunately I can't since that would make me 'Un-American' because I wouldn't fall in line with radical republican war mongers. Please note that I just got back from your country today and thoroughly enjoyed your hospitality.
Posted by: Rich Z on March 4, 2003 01:41 PMHaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...
Good one!
We do have good microbreweries though....
kinda like bloggers--under the radar.
Posted by: ray on March 4, 2003 07:09 PMYeah I sampled a few of the micro breweries when I was in Colorado a few years back - I also like Sierra Nevada Brewery - the y make a really fine porter :-)
Posted by: The Dynamic Driveler on March 4, 2003 07:14 PMApology accepted.
- America
p.s. Glad to see that your dollar is still holding its value as monopoly money.
p.p.s. If it wasn’t for France, we’d all still be making fun of you.
bq. p.s. Glad to see that your dollar is still holding its value as monopoly money.
Look again - it may be worth less than yours but that works to our favour, and our economy has been doing better than yours for the lat year or so.
bq. p.p.s. If it wasn’t for France, we’d all still be making fun of you.
If it wasn't for France you'd still be British colonists.
Posted by: The Dynamic Driveler on April 3, 2003 08:29 AM