Beery Quotes
- You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. –Frank Zappa
- Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. –Ernest Hemingway
- Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. –Winston Churchill
- He was a wise man who invented beer. –Plato
- Time is never wasted when you’re wasted all the time. –Catherine Zandonella
- A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her. –W.C. Fields
- Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink. –Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it. –His reply
- If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs. –David Daye
- Work is the curse of the drinking class. –Oscar Wilde
- When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. –Henny Youngman
- Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. –Benjamin Franklin
- If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.–Deep Thought, Jack Handy
- Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. –Dave Barry
- The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. –Humphrey Bogart
- Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine. –David Moulton
- People who drink light “beer” don’t like the taste of beer; they just like to pee a lot. –Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI
- Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.–Kaiser Wilhelm
- Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. –Dave Barry
- I drink to make other people interesting. –George Jean Nathan
- They who drink beer will think beer. –Washington Irving
- An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. –For Whom the Bell Tolls, Ernest Hemingway
- You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. –Dean Martin
- All right, brain, I don’t like you and you don’t like me - so let’s just do this and I’ll get back to killing you with beer. –Homer Simpson
