THE PRINCESS
Once upon a time there lived a king. The king had a beautiful daughter, the princess. But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt. No matter what; metal, wood, plastic - anything she touched would melt. Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her. The king [...]
Date: October 12th, 2006
The Push
A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it’s half past three in the morning. “I’m not getting out of bed at this time,” he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows.
“Aren’t you going to answer [...]
The Perfect Husband
There are several men in the locker room of a private club after exercising. Suddenly a cell phone that was on one of the benches rings.A man picks it up and the following conversation ensues:
“Hello?”
“Honey, It’s me.”
“Sugar!”
“Are you at the club?”
“Yes.”
“Great! I am at the mall 2 blocks from where you are. I saw a [...]
The Outhouse
The service station trade was slow
The owner sat around,
With sharpened knife and cedar stick
Piled shavings on the ground.
No modern facilities had they,
The log across the rill
Led to a shack, marked His and Hers
That sat against the hill.
“Where is the ladies restroom, sir?”
The owner leaning back,
Said not a word but whittled on,
And nodded toward the shack.
With [...]
The Laws of Physics for Cartoons
With an educational background in Physics (in which they taught us the word is always said as though it is capitalized) and an avid fan of cartoon and comic strips, perhaps it was inevitable that I would be compelled to codify those laws of physics which operate (or don’t!)in the cartoon universe. Actually many of [...]
The Importance of Correct Punctuation
From: Games Magazine (1984)
Dear John:
I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we’re apart. I can be forever [...]
Valentines Gift
A young man wanted to purchase a gift for his new sweetheart for Valentine’s day, but they had not been dating very long. After careful consideration, he decided a pair of gloves would strike the right note: romantic but not too personal. Accompanied by his sweetheart’s younger sister, he went to Nordstrom’s and bought a [...]
